Eat Cake Be Happy

What a gift to eat cake without fear.

I remember believing I would go to my grave, never eating another piece of chocolate or dessert. I had surrendered to the fact that eating dessert was too painful. I would lament, obsess, and ultimately binge and purge when I ate cake. So, I stopped completely. It was the right choice for myself at the time because eating sweets was stealing my life of joy. Like an alcoholic that gives up alcohol, I found freedom without sugar.

However, after many years( eight to be exact), I realized I had no trust in myself that I could heal my relationship with food. I felt flawed. Without faith, I declared I was a compulsive overeater that would fall into the depths of despair with even one bite of cake.

During my years of healing, I found that my suffering had little to do with food; it rarely does. It was deeper.
Food was my escape. The problem wasn’t the food; it was a fear of feeling. Any time I would have an uncomfortable emotion, I would over or under-eat. In my attempt to have a smile on my face, I stuffed food in my mouth.
I was afraid to be ME, raw, real, and uncensored. I didn’t even know what that meant. But I knew that if I obsessed about my weight, I wouldn’t have to face myself. “Would I be accepted? Would I be loved? Would I be abandoned for being me?” These were my subconscious thoughts that kept me suffering from my weight and food for years.

My commitment to healing brought me to my knees. Moment by moment, I became present to my emotions. To my surprise, it wasn’t too bad. I even reclaimed my Pleasure.

I found that being ME meant being confident, goofy, defensive at times, sincere, messy, and loving.

Healing my relationship with food taught me that it is safe to be me.
Life is a continuous journey of self-acceptance.

Fast forward, I eat cake with pleasure and joy, AND I love baking cakes, pies, and desserts. Do I overindulge at times? Um, yes, I do. Do I obsess, feel like a failure, and worry about gaining weight while eating these desserts? Absolutely not!! Finding peace and freedom with food is not easy, but TOTALLY doable. Not only do you get to...... More below I’m comments.